six degrees

Six degrees of separation (also referred to as the "Human Web") refers to the idea that, if a person is one step away from each person they know and two steps away from each person who is known by one of the people they know, then everyone is no more than six "steps" away from each person on Earth. The easier way to understand this is that person A only need an average of six people in between to connect to person B. (Suppose person A and B don't know each other.)

All I know is that it is too cold outside. Today the temperature read 5 degrees. The papa brought home a stomach bug yesterday that I have been trying to avoid. This afternoon it got me too and now I feel as though someone is kicking me in the stomach. Regardless of our sickness, our refrigerator and pantry were empty of food and the boys were beginning to lose their minds and climb the walls in boredom. So the panda took them to play in the Eagle's Nest and to Target while he grocery shopped and I headed to the library for a pile of books and DVD's to keep the kiddos busy through the long, cold weekend. Thankfully we have food now, although we are both too sick to eat any of it. (I had Amazon flakes for dinner.)

I was hoping to find a good movie to watch, but it seemed like everyone else had the same idea, so there wasn't much left to choose from. I ended up getting a film entitled, "How to cook your life" with Zen Chef Edward Espe brown. Not exactly what I had in mind, but hopefully it will help me to find Nirvana in the kitchen again, which I could really use. I am struggling to find joy in the kitchen lately. I don't know if it's the weather or that time of the month, or what.. but I am craving food that is not healthy and I want someone to make it for me. Unfortunately (or fortunately?) I don't have the option to give in to those types of food unless I want to end up back in the hospital again, so instead I eat a bowl of cereal and feel disappointed and sorry for myself.

I have all of these beautifully illustrated cookbooks from the library on how to make delectable raw foods, but they require so many ingredients that are either difficult to find during the cold months in Ohio or involve way more time than I have in the course of my day. I have dreams of throwing on a cami, a flowy skirt, and some cute kitten heels.. jumping on my bike (with a basket, of course) and cruising down to the local market on a warm sunny day. The produce is readily available and bursting with color and fragrance. I become inspired by the sights and smells surrounding me and am bursting with energy from the rays of sunshine and fresh air.

But instead, my shopping trips now consist of bundling up and braving the fierce sharp winds to find a measly amount of not so great looking (or fake, polished looking) produce at the local market. By the time I get home I am grumpy, cold, and too tired to cook. I feel drained of energy, eat a Lara bar, and try to remind myself of how blessed I am to have the shopping options that I do. Within 10 minutes I can easily reach several grocery stores and am 20 min to a Whole Foods store. And although we do have to be incredibly thrifty with our food budget, I can at least afford to buy fresh produce. Many people do not have these privileges and options.

Sometimes I am so envious of people who live in places that are warm year round and have access to farmers markets and raw food restaurants all the time, and although I still daydream of moving to someplace like that myself one day, I am grateful for the things we do have.. a panda with 2 good jobs that enables us to buy food, 2 cars, and easy access to grocery markets with a somewhat decent amount of options. In between my grumbles, I feel so blessed to have food to feed my babes' bellies and although we have always had to get creative and make food last, we have never had to go without. I am eternally thankful for all that we have been given.

Each time I eat an apple or a piece of bread I try to remember every now and then to say a prayer for someone who is hungry. I feel that food is the one source that connects each of us together and for one to go without should have an affect on us all. I encourage each of you to read the book I just finished entitled, "Closing the Food Gap" by Mark Winne. More of my thoughts on this eye-opening book to come.. :)

Time to tuck my little birdies into bed now.. hope you all have a warm, snuggly night!