Nesting and testing

I'm in somewhat of a snow daze today.. partly because of the sinus medicine I took, but mostly because I've been staring out the window at the thick blanket of snow forming on the ground for most the afternoon. That is.. in between doing dishes, making meals and snacks, and cleaning up the Star Wars figures basket that my little one keeps dumping out all over the living room and then not playing with. He has really been testing my patience this week. I remember being warned about the terrible two's, but for me the battle has been with the strong-willed, defiant 3's. That's when it hit my oldest and now my younger one is going through this phase.

He is sneaky. Yesterday I found an ENTIRE box of fruit snacks and graham crackers eaten and stashed under the couch.. (those snacks will from now on be hidden way up on the top pantry shelf.) He lies to my face, when I've witness the truth with my own eyes. And he growls at me. We have been struggling with potty training for a year and a half now. I had him completely trained and then he decided he was over using the potty and was not going to do it anymore. As if to say, "That was fun for a minute, now lets move on to something else!' He knows how to go and chooses not to. I let him get away with this for quite awhile now, but have recently decided to try again after he started taking his diapers off and throwing them on the floor, because they're "icky." So, he did this again this afternoon and I told him that if he didn't like wearing diapers than he should try wearing underwear again. He then proceeded to scrunch up his face, growl, and then swing a fist at me.. which I barely dodged. Earlier I was not so lucky and got hit hard in the side of the head with a light saber. Needless to say, he is having some quiet time alone in his room right now and I am hoping will maybe take a nap and wake up in a better mood.

It's so difficult and confusing how my little babe can one minute be so sweet and loving and the next behave like a monster. My oldest son, thankfully.. although he still has his moments.. has grown out of this "testing mommy" phase and is much more helpful and sometimes even considerate these days. He often helps his little brother clean up messes that he did not make, remembers to bring his dirty dishes to the kitchen when he's finished eating, and most days makes his bed. Or at least when I have to remind him, doesn't complain. It gives me hope that my younger one will eventually grow out of this phase too and eventually I will have more help around the house.

Right now it's exhausting though. He dumps toys out, leaves them there, and then moves onto another basket to dump out. He will eat an apple or banana and then throw the core or peel on the floor, even though he knows where it goes. He manages to spill and break everything he touches, he doesn't think before he jumps. He is a wild animal. But he has a huge heart and I love him to pieces. Sometimes when we're snuggled up on the couch together and I glance over at him, he still seems like such a baby. I know that testing me and pushing my limits is just a natural part of growing up and his way of trying to pull away from me a bit. It is challenging as a parent to try to comfort and protect your children, to set limits and rules, while still allowing them the space to find their independence and the freedom to voice their own opinions. As a mama bird, it is my job to teach them to be loving, kind, considerate, helpful, and compassionate.. so that one day when they go off into the word on their own, hopefully they will make good decisions and treat others as they would want to be treated themselves. Until then though, I want to keep them safe in the nest with me as long as possible..

Just now, my oldest one came in to ask if he could make a pb sandwich. I asked if he needed help and he replied that he couldn't reach a plate. I love that he is independent enough to make a sandwich on his own, but still needs me for just a bit longer to reach the plates for him. :)

Oh, and I just went into check on my little one, who is not sleeping.. but instead has somehow very quietly taken all the books off the shelf in his room and gotten into his older brother's desk. I finally just got the living room cleaned up and will probably be picking it up again very shortly. In the meantime, I'm off to do laundry now..

I hope you're all staying warm and snuggly in your nests today and if you are out in the cold, I pray you make it back to your nest safely.