Candlesticks and branches

Welcome to my blog! I wanted to find a way to bring family and friends closer to me, into a community of my own. To share my thoughts, feelings, ideas, and images in a collective way. Everyone is welcome, so please make yourselves at home. I hope you enjoy your time spent with me here. :) Much love and many blessings, Erin

The snow is falling outside my window, my bedroom is aglow with warm lamplight. I got caught up this evening in the mystery of a passage in the Bible. Zechariah 4 - The candlestick and the olive trees, which then lead me back and forth between the visions and prophesies of Zechariah and the Book of Revelation. I love to become lost in the dreams and images of the Scriptures. Part of what draws me in is the mystery and intrigue of each passage. I can read the same book over and over and learn something new each time depending on where I'm at in my life during that moment.

Every winter I suffer from severe depression. I feel the cold starting to creep into my being and attempt to warm it up by stringing fairy lights all over the house, burning candles, and taking long baths. The days and nights become longer, time seems to slow, and my body aches for sunlight. I have difficulty pulling myself out from underneath my alternative down comforter each morning, lost in dreams of sand and salty warm breezes. Sometimes I go through similar spiritual seasons. I have moments of feeling far away from the warm protection of my Creator. My soul becomes distant and cold, I find myself shutting off and shutting down. I don't feel much like talking or praying, just wanting to be left alone. I love that God sometimes allows us to have the space we need for a time and lets us sit in quiet contemplation, lost in our own world of fantasy and self discovery. Each time though He brings me back even closer to Him. He reminds me that it's okay to feel this way and that He's here for me when I feel like coming out from beneath the covers.

I love the passage comparison between the burning oil of the lamps and the Holy Spirit. I worry sometimes that I might lose that spark, that one day the flame might go out or that I will allow it to be blown out by someone else. I think that is why it is so important to continue to nurture our souls. To find ways to shed light into the darkness so that we don't become cold and empty. For me that means surrounding myself with music that fills me up and moves me emotionally, to read stories and play board games with my children, to laugh with friends, to watch a movie that causes me look at life a little differently, to knead dough and watch it slowly rise, to practice yoga and take time to simply listen to my breath, and to delve into the beautiful mysteries of the Scriptures. I hope you each take time this winter to slow down and enjoy the silence and the stillness, and that you spend a little time each day doing something that fills your soul up with warmth.

Sweet dreams..